vaya con pance

a hazy shade February 26, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — gogopance @ 6:06 pm

If a song could be a picture I think it would be this one.


warning: harsh post ahead February 22, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — gogopance @ 10:48 pm

I can’t help myself. I have to get this out, from high atop my soap box, even though it’s kinda pitiful to degrade GoGoPance to a post about American Girl Dolls. I am financially and morally against this business that reeks of yuppie exclusivity; however, my Goddaughter has two of them and a giggly fondness for all associated outfits and accessories. They make her happy, so I am more than happy to keep my thoughts to myself – and to the Interwebs of course – at this time. I also know one day we’ll be on the same sarcastic, grown-up page. But until then I will just stockpile material.

In three days I was at the American Girl Doll store on 5th Avenue twice, once to buy the birthday gift certificates and once to spend the birthday gift certificates. Some take-a-ways:

On the left, “American Girl Doll Gynecological Kit.” On the right, “Mommy Abuses Me Accessory Kit.”

The magnificently stereotyped “Jungle Play Tent” set:

Finally, “Housewife American Girl Doll.” She comes with her own bottle of Valium, one restraining order and a carton of Marlboro Reds.

Closing note: Each AGD comes with her own background story. When my Goddaughter got hers a couple Christmases ago we read the story together. The Daddy was a doctor who took care of wounded soldiers in England circa WW2. Next to that part of the book was a printed picture of Hitler.

I do not make this stuff up.


oh dear me February 18, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — gogopance @ 3:51 pm

I actually like the coffee from my building’s little convenience store. I feel weird liking it because you’re not supposed to like office coffee, you’re supposed to start every day carrying in your own preferred [status-symbol] cup. After all, taste for good coffee denotes good taste in all matters.

But, regardless, I visit the downstairs Coffee Guys every day. I walk in and they pour my coffee without me even saying anything. Occasionally I’ll get a confirming “Small, dear?” But maybe that’s just on the days I look like I might need a medium instead.

At Christmas I bought them a card picturing a snowman refusing coffee because it’ll “go right through me.” Yuk yuk yuk. And at the start of the new year they still had my coffee ready for me, but I hadn’t heard the warmfuzzy “dear” in a while. I started to worry my card + small monetary gift wasn’t well received. I began obsessing. Would I need to pick a new, scary, outside coffee place?! I *needed* to hear the dear!

Today I went in… coffee served… wallet opened – no cash. I looked up at them ala Puss in Boots, “Umm, I need to run and get cash.” The Register Coffee Guy looked down at me and said, “Oh, just bring it by later, dear.”

Phew. We are back in coffee business, people.


serenity now. and laters. February 12, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — gogopance @ 1:56 pm

I hit the Vermont slopes this past weekend. And by “hit” I mean I rallied the fun, booked the fun and fed the fun. Actual time spent on said slopes = zero. Several failed downhill attempts in my life means this Pance do not ski. Snow tubing, yes. Apres ski hot tubbing and toddy’ing, yes and yes. Fireside reading, yes. Major limbs akimbo in speeds of 20 mph plus. No, but thanks anyway.

I did, however, try cross country skiing and snowshoeing for the first time and it was pretty darn awesome. I was the *only* one on the trails and thoroughly enjoyed the me-time channeling Emerson amidst the snow hush.

Weekend highlights = a bag full of vintage candy (who knew Squirrel Nut Zippers are not just a band?!?), Sushi, Sake & Schlitz night, homemade fajitas and bottomless rum night, a stop by the overwhelmingly odorous Yankee Candle Factory and witty conversation on the brilliance that is “Dirty Dancing” and the proper, badassiest way to flip the bird. Finish it off with a Friendly’s Happy Ending sundae with peanut butter sauce and the circle of fun is unbroken. Yay us!


affle hse February 9, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — gogopance @ 6:18 pm

Back as a wee Pance we would often travel up I81 to the town of Buchanan to spend weekends at MaMa’s house (aka, maternal grandmother). Only an hour away, it lent itself nicely to an easy, fun and frequent vacation opportunity. The return drive was consistently dotted with Mom’s comments on the sheer mass of Mack trucks that travel north on Sundays and how we, thank goodness – “I wouldn’t want to battle that traffic” –¬†were headed south. (Amen to that)

And I always knew when Blacksburg was just around the bend when we reached the golden rectangular letters advertising WAFFLE HOUSE. Except, we never passed by when some combination of letters weren’t burnt out. It was the perfect game to end every trip… sound out the letters that were left, then laugh and laugh and laugh. Look! It’s Wale ouse! Hahaha, we’re home!

And oh what a staple in my life Waffle House would become. In high school – the best place to sober your friends up before returning them safely home. In college – the best breakfast to feed a hangover. A jukebox of special songs, a menu of signature grub. You can scatter, smother, cover and chunk me anytime, Waffle House.

Having moved north to the land of no Waffle Houses, I was forced to organize a Waffle House Road Trip to the lucky location closest to NYC. Bethlehem, PA, 1.75 hours south (of course). All in all, very doable. Except now I have to battle all those Mack trucks on the return trip. Oh the sacrifices.