“How to Spend Your One Day in Dallas” by GoGoPance
11:00AM: Leisurely arise and stroll around the super cute town square of McKinney, Texas (near where you happen to be staying, quite a’spell north of downtown Dallas). Remark on its Stars Hollow-like qualities.
12:00PM: Lunch at Spoons Cafe & Bar. Order two different salads to split. Be shocked and overly appreciative when the wait staff takes the time to actually SPLIT the salads into two portions each.
1:00PM: Walk across the square to Landon Winery. Get a little chatty and a little buzzy because you’re drinking extra generous tasting pours. Walk out with an excessive amount of purchases. Be silently glad you are drinking grapes instead of picking at a bottomless bag of them in Big Poppa.
2:30PM: Drive into Dallas to visit The Sixth Floor Museum at Dealey Plaza – aka, the infamous floor of the Texas School Book Depository that held JFK’s assassinator. Take an audio tour of Kennedy’s life and death. Look out the same row of windows that launched the bullets nearly 50 years ago. Recall your [unnerving] obsession with the whole event circa 1987. Leave with “Hail to the Chief” stuck in your head.
3:35PM: Stand in THE grassy knoll and take a picture from the same angle of Abraham Zapruder’s famous footage.
4:30PM: Lighten the mood a little and swing by Southfork Ranch – aka, THE Dallas. Think only to yourself (because it somehow feels socially unacceptable) how, “Who shot JR?!?” was quite an impressive bookend to “Who shot Kennedy?!?”
7:00PM: Order “thin crust Chicago-style” pizza for dinner, simply because it seems like an odd contradiction in terms.
11:00PM: Retire early with the theme of “Dallas” stuck in your head, prepared for yet another 10’er tomorrow.